Twilight: Pay per View

It was during the second time I watched this movie on Saturday evening (after my cousin and her husband and mine all went to bed) that another point occurred to me.

The Edward obsession…specifically the obsession by women in their 30’s-40’s.  I have talked (see other Twilight posts) about some of the more obvious themes and reasons for this obsession.  But I think that most people married (or not) have had an Edward by this age.  I mean this in the forbidden sense.  Maybe it was a neighbor, or friend of a friend or a co-worker…someone you could not have because they were married or your friends boyfriend or older or younger or co-worker or boss or a host of other reasons why this would be a bad idea. 

I will have to say that late Saturday night as I watched their interaction and realizing it was all said in the unsaid.  I wondered how many relationships exist or existed without ever being discussed.  Have you ever met someone and you had chemistry and before you knew it he or she was all you could think about, wonder what they were thinking about and having intense non-conversations after only a brief encounter and without a physical relationship? 

It’s chemistry.  I have had an Edward.  I never “had” him, thank God or this blog would be about my life as a divorced mother of two.  I am not saying anything bad about divorce I am just saying in my case that having this Edward was as much fantasy as Twilight and the end result would have been like being turned into a vampire…a long miserable death of a life without my family. 

If you have had an Edward in your life, those intense feelings for someone, wondering what he is thinking and feeling well, the thought of him being able to sneak into your window and hang out with you while the rest of the world is fast asleep….you get it. 

So, my Edward, he was beautiful, he was powerful and I do think at times he looked at me like he would eat me for dinner…I don’t even know if it was a two-sided relationship, that is how unspoken this was.  It is laughable now and embarrassing.  I am not even sure who I was.  I met him and I felt like I knew him my entire life.  I just wanted to talk to him and of course wondered what it would be like to kiss him.  It was that innocent and that scandalous all at the same time.  I just felt sick and crazy when I was around him.  And now I am thankful that I am no longer in a situation where I would be subject to his “glamour”.

I think most people run into something like this at some point in their life and I do think this is part of the reason women are obsessed with the story.  Except in our version we don’t have an indestructible, beautiful, eternal living man that protects us and sneaks into our bedroom at night just to watch us sleep.  Nope.  We think that in the beginning.  The reality is that our guy is in another house, on a cul de sac or in some community, watching his big screen TV.  He is imperfect and flawed and he will die old and most likely with some disease and probably have a gut and it’s really rather tragic. 

I think it best that we all keep “the Edwards” out of our heads….see this story even proves that time and space heal all…I was over my own obsession with Twilight.  I had read the books, watched the movie and now, here I am pay per view at my fingertips and the special addition DVD in route.  It’s like opening a wound.  I will have to watch the special features and then give it away, like I did the books.  I will need to close this chapter once more.  Or, maybe you are never really over this sort of thing…

E